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Trauma and Attachment Informed EMDR Therapy

New Roads Counseling - Marty Schwebel, LMFT

Providing psychotherapy for those who are overwhelmed with life

Yo, I don’t do “vulnerable.”

June 26, 2019 by Marty

Are you enough? Are you worthy?

This seems to be the question of our time. So many of us struggle with worthiness and feel that we are not thin enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, rich enough and the list goes on an on. 

Do you believe that you are enough or do you constantly hear an inner voice that says “I’ll never measure up?”

Have you ever not done something you want to do because you are afraid of what others might think or that they may see your flaws?

I fight with my negative inner voice every week when I write this blog. I wonder if this blog does not measure up or is as good as other blogs. Each week that could lead to me not writing this blog and therefore someone not getting the encouragement that I hope to give them. 

What I learned from Brene Brown.

So, I began to listen to an academic researcher from my hometown of Houston. Her name is Brene Brown and if you have not heard of her just google her name. Watch her first Ted Talk from Tedx Houston in 2010 and then watch her latest Netflix special and then read any of her best selling books. The reason I want you to do this is because you are going to learn a lot about yourself if you do. 

Brene talks about how shame is the feeling we have when we say we are “not good enough; not thin enough, not fast enough, not smart enough.” The NOT ____________ ENOUGH syndrome is powerful in our culture and is probably what I talk about with almost every client I work with in my practice. She also talks about how to distinguish between shame and guilt. Guilt is “I did something bad.” Shame is “I am bad.” We often drown in shame instead of allowing guilt to be a motivator to move forward towards a growth mindset. 

What would it take for you to believe that you ARE enough?

What would it take for you to truly have a sense of worthiness? Well, Brene says that vulnerability is what it takes and that vulnerability and courage are synonymous. It takes courage to face our imperfections and still know that we have a clear purpose (that we matter) on this earth. 

What does it mean for you to be vulnerable? 

For me, vulnerability means being completely open and honest in my relationship with God/Jesus. If He can’t handle my ugly, then who can? After this, vulnerability means forming relationships with safe people and then sharing my struggles with them. 

I encourage you to explore what being vulnerable means to you. Talk to God about it. Talk to a friend about it. Talk to a therapist about it. 

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: anxiety, brene brown, courage, gifts of imperfection, therapist near me, trauma therapist near me, vulnerability

Marty Schwebel

Licensed in California (#103247)
Licensed in Texas (#203784)

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Marty Schwebel, LMFT
Licensed in California (#103247)
Licensed in Texas (#203784)
EMDR Certified

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New Roads Counseling & Retreats provides psychotherapy and EMDR for Trauma, Compassion Fatigue, and PTSD.

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